Where stands it written?

 

"Var står det skrivet?" is the actual title of today's article, which, when translated from the original Swedish, means "Where is it written?" This was one of the common phrases from the Free Church movement in Europe and the United States. The meaning of the phrase is an encouragement to go back to scripture as the primary authority of our faith. Now, I could talk about a lot of different doctrinal controversies where this phrase might be used, but instead, I want to describe how I use the idea in interpersonal conflict resolution.

As a Christian, it is important to be willing to hear criticisms and accept correction. So when someone comes and tells you that you have hurt them or done something wrong, it is important to listen to them and be willing to examine yourself. God wants to examine our hearts (see Psalm 139:23-24), and He often uses other people to help us see where we have gone wrong (see Proverbs 27:6). On the other hand, just because someone is upset with you or perceives that you have wronged them does not mean you have actually sinned. It is important to examine yourself in light of what scripture says. Second Timothy 3:16-17 says, "All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work." So we can and should use scripture to correct us and help us grow.

Therefore, both when examining ourselves and when considering correcting another person, we should look to scripture and ask, "Where is it written?" In other words, how have I specifically broken a command of God, either according to the letter of the law or the spirit of the law? Likewise, when we feel wronged by someone else or think they have sinned, we should try to be specific about how they sinned. We should think about what specifically happened and how that made us feel (it's a good idea to write it out), and then search the scriptures for how these actions, words, or attitudes violated specific principles and commandments that God has given us.

A good example of this can be found in an article by Rosaria Butterfield, where she identifies what she did wrong by going to scripture and referencing the specific commandment. She goes further and identifies the motives and why those were wrong. She also explains why she is making a public apology for a public sin.

Getting specific from scripture helps in a number of ways. First, when we have sinned, we cannot know what to apologize for or what to correct unless we know specifically what we have done. Therefore, identifying the specific wrong helps to correct it so it will not happen again. Second, it takes the burden away from the interpersonal conflict and helps us see that sin is first and foremost against our Creator and Judge. It is easy to get defensive when you believe that the offense is primarily against another imperfect human. You can look at their faults and fail to take your own wrongs seriously. But when you know that you have sinned against the perfect and holy God, you know you cannot use the excuse of being no worse than the other person (See Psalm 51:4 for David's example of repentance to God).

Third, sometimes we discover that, in fact, there is no sin for which we need to repent. People might feel bad or take offense for any number of reasons, and sometimes their emotions are directed at the wrong cause. Emotions tell us something about what is going on in us but are not very accurate indicators of the truth. Therefore, we need to examine them to discover what is causing them and whether our thoughts and feelings conform to the truth of scripture and the reality of the world around us.

If we ask, "Where stands it written?" before and during a conflict, we will more likely get to the truth of what is happening. Then rather than escalating it, we can either defuse it by discovering that no sin had taken place or resolve it by repentance and forgiveness for the specific wrongs done.